Finding The Goddess


Having direct contact with a deity is no small matter, let me tell you. I’ll never forget the first time it happened…it was the most awe-inspiring, emotional, and ecstatic moment of my entire life. It was the moment that my destiny was revealed to me…and the future course of the human race was laid out like a map.

I had been a lucid dreaming practitioner for several years, and I had become rather obsessed with the whole thing. The idea of achieving complete conscious awareness in your dreams was absolutely fascinating to me, and all I could think about was becoming the best at it that I possibly could be.

Being aware I was dreaming wasn’t enough for me…I actually wanted to achieve total dominion of my dreamworld — to be able to control every aspect of my lucid dreams. Eventually, with countless practice sessions, lots of study, and a stubborn perseverance, I was able to achieve the mastery of lucid dreaming I enjoy today.

When I came into my own with this skill, I immediately began exploring my dreamworld. I’ve always been one who believes that dreams are an extension of reality, not just a meaningless nightly delusion your brain produces for you when you sleep. The possibility that truths about the universe, existence, and reality itself could be found deep within dreams is something that captured my imagination long ago.

I remember that the first dream character I spoke to about my “meaning quest” was a young Buddhist monk tending a garden. He appeared maybe 11 or 12, and he kept looking at me funny when I asked him where I should go to find the meaning of life.

He eventually answered me…”The meaning you seek doesn’t exist yet, practitioner, because you have not created it. You must see the old man on the mountain to learn more.” I was left speechless by what the boy told me…he said so little, yet it seemed remarkably deep in a very mysterious way.


The Test

I climbed the mountain and met with the old man, who told me I was impudent and arrogant to even dare try to find the meaning of life. I told him that I felt it was my right to seek it out, and that knowledge of such a thing should not be only for the initiated.

He looked annoyed, then got up from the lotus position he had kept since I arrived, and painted two rectangles in the air in front of me. They quickly began to glow and what seemed like portals developed in each rectangle. They both looked to lead straight into outer space.

The old man turned to me and said sternly “One of these doors will lead you to Her realm…a place of great joy. The other will lead you to a place of total misery where you will become lost in your dreamworld, never to awaken again. You must now choose.”

I was taken aback by the choice that was presented to me…and curious as to the identity of the “Her” that he referenced. When I began to question him, the old man raised his voice sharply and commanded “Choose!”

After thinking for a moment on my decision, the old man offered some advice. “It is insane to even consider making a choice. Go home, practitioner, to the safety of your bed. This is not meant for you.”

I tilted my head down in shame at my trepidation…then, after a second, it hit me. A broad smile came over my face as I turned confidently to face the old man head-on.

“No, I think I WILL choose, sir. And if I’m right, my destination won’t depend on which portal I pick…it will depend on the state of my mind when I pick it!” The expression on the old man’s face turned from one of annoyance, to one of complete surprise.

“You…you know. How can you know??” He asked, seeming almost stunned in his shock.

“Because I am a dream master.” I replied triumphantly. “As in a nightmare, I can only be hurt by that which my fear allows to hurt me. I have conquered this world…I have nothing at all to fear here!”

The old man then smiled, and quickly bowed. “You have passed, my master. Enter either door and she will be waiting for you.”

I thanked him for the test, bowed, and confidently walked through the left portal.

What happened next would not only change my life forever…but it would completely shake everything I thought I knew to be true.

Stay tuned for more…

– Max Westerly